Lindsey Buckingham at the Riviera Theatre

Originally posted to my Patreon page on November 29, 2019.

The night started with a snowstorm and ended after a blizzard of energy, excitement, and emotion.

Lindsey Buckingham, and it kills me to have to type this next part, former guitarist, singer/songwriter, and musical architect for the legendary rock band, Fleetwood Mac, came to the historic Riviera Theatre in North Tonawanda last night on a solo trek backing his newly released solo compilation, Solo Anthology: The Best of Lindsey Buckingham. It was his first trip to the Buffalo area as a solo artist; the first time I’ve gone to see him and gotten to sleep in my own bed afterward.

I should add a disclaimer here that it would be difficult for me to say that anything Lindsey Buckingham sings and plays is anything less than perfect. I simply adore him. That said, damn near everything Lindsey Buckingham sings and plays is perfect. It just is. Period. He is a musical force.

It isn't just what he plays either. It's how he plays. The finger-picking style of playing guitar is most often seen used by folk or country artists. Somehow Buckingham uses this style, adapted by him to include all five fingers of his right hand, to unleash rock and roll fire from his favored Turner model electric guitar, as well as the army of other guitars he uses throughout his set. He is both rhythm and lead guitarist, simultaneously. I’ve been watching him play now for 21 years and his playing never ceases to amaze me. It never will. I will never not appreciate how hard his guitar tech, Stanley LaMendola, a phenomenal guitarist in his own right, works just off stage to keep those guitars in tune and supplied to Buckingham on cue.

Buckingham didn’t mention Fleetwood Mac by name. The closest he got was when he explained how he’s someone who has always preferred to look forward instead of behind and how that’s what they were doing with this tour. His sincere appreciation for our support for him and the new record was palpable.

In the wake of his dismissal from the band that he helped steer into rock and roll infamy, much has been said in the media and the Fleetwood Mac fandom about Buckingham’s perfectionist nature as an artist and the sometimes abrasive temperament that rears its head because of it. Of course, it's a very different thing to be his fan than it is to be his band mate, but I had the great pleasure to meet him last night (and last month in Pittsburgh) and Lindsey Buckingham, the man, comes across as a soft-spoken, gentle sweetheart.

I interrupt this professional review by Writer Kristen for a few words from Fangirl Kristen: 

I went into the meet & greet this time without thinking about what I was going to say to Lindsey. I beat my anxiety back for weeks and made a conscious effort to not examine to death what I would say to him and how I would say it. I was just going to be myself. 

And it worked!

I explained to him that I was so excited to meet him in Pittsburgh that I acted like a moron and forgot to introduce myself, and he chuckled and told me he didn't think that makes me a moron. I finally told him that my name is Kristen. As we shook hands, he noticed his pick that I was wearing on a leather cord around my neck, which he gave me on my birthday down in Nashville in 2012. His eyes lit up and he tapped it, telling me he "liked that very much!"  

We took our picture and then, noticing how out of place his healthy southern Californian glow was in a room full of pasty Buffalonians, I asked him if he was enjoying our weather. (It was a blizzard outside.) He rolled his eyes and grumbled and said sarcastically, "Yeah, it's really cool." I laughed and elbowed him gently and said, "Ha ha, cool, right?" and he did that dorky laugh thing that he does that was so endearing it would have made me cry if I wasn't this new and improved Kristen. I indeed held it together though and wished him a good show and that was that. 

See, this is what happens when I don't agonize over what I'm going to say and just be myself. Good things!

Back to Writer Kristen...

Aside from a slightly overzealous fan in the crowd who shouted “F*ck the Mac when we got you, kid!” near the end of the night, transforming this Buffalo suburb briefly into Boston, apparently, Fleetwood Mac wasn’t mentioned at all.

It was on all our minds though. At least, it was on mine.

Fleetwood Mac is my forever favorite band. I will always love them. Their music is deeply ingrained in me. It’s a crucial element of my soul. They are my soul.

I made the decision to see them with their new lineup in Cleveland last month, and I’m glad I did. I still love them. Even after this. It’s impossible for me to not. I tried and I can’t do it. But it’s been a painful eight months coming to terms with the fact that Buckingham is no longer a part of them.

If it’s this way for me, I can only imagine how difficult this has been for Buckingham himself.

His quiet defiance while playing through the Mac song “Never Going Back Again” hit me hard. As was the case last month in Pittsburgh, it felt very final. The song that was once about a lost love is now about a lost band and lost friends. Four friends with whom he experienced and survived things that nobody else in his life ever can or ever will be able to understand. 

It must be so isolating. His defiance during "Never Going Back Again" was clear and strong but it was also forced. He has no choice but to look forward. He has no choice but to never go back again. It was palpable on his face, as we cheered him through the final parts of the song, how much he needs us, and I think, I hope, our cheers let him know how very much we still need him. 

His final song hit me the hardest. He chose the aptly-named ditty “Treason” off his brilliant 2008 solo album, Gift of Screws. “Deep down there’s freedom. Deep down there will be a reason. At the end of the season, we will rise from this treason.” 

Written and released years ago, the song has never been more appropriate to play than now. Buckingham has been a prophetic writer for most of his career, starting way back on the highly-underappreciated in its time but now cult classic 1973 album, Buckingham Nicks. It’s almost as if he’s always known, deep down, that it would all come to this.

Apologies to Mr. Buckingham for standing right in front of him and sobbing as he played through this one last night. But it was like watching one-fifth of my soul floundering while it took special care to reassure me that everything would be okay, in the end.

Highlights of the show for me (if I can't choose the entire show) were the album versions of “Slow Dancing,” “Holiday Road” (off the National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation soundtrack), “Go Insane,” and the crushingly beautiful gems, "Not Too Late" "Down on Rodeo" and “Shut Us Down,” the last of which came from his 2006 solo record, Under The Skin.

This is another song that has new meaning now. “Oh, you and I we sure can dream of conversations that might have been... And even after all these years, I can't even see you clear... Oh, I won't shut us down. No, I will stay around. As long as I can. As long as I can…”

Two weeks ago during his set, after a long and thoughtful pause, Buckingham dedicated this song to Stevie Nicks, his childhood friend, former girlfriend, and now former band mate; the woman rumored to be responsible for his ouster from Fleetwood Mac, after allegedly declaring that she never wanted to share a stage with him again.

That dedication might be all that needs to be said about Lindsey Buckingham, the man.

Lindsey Buckingham living is best life in Pittsburgh

Originally posted to my Patreon page on October 20, 2018.

I have to get the fangirl part of this out of the way. Apologies for those who only came here to read about Lindsey Buckingham’s show. I’ll try to be brief.

GUYS. I met Lindsey Buckingham! I’ve been waiting 21 years and it finally happened and it was everything I dreamed it would be.

To be perfectly honest, I was terrified to meet him. I’ve had a nasty habit of putting people on pedestals throughout my life and just about every one of them has come tumbling down in fiery ruins by now. In a Landslide, even. Ahem.

I was afraid I would finally come face to face with Lindsey and he wouldn’t live up to the ridiculously high standards I’ve held him to for two decades and a year (and two months but who’s counting?). What if he was cranky? I’d be cranky having to meet and greet that many people who have invested so much of their hearts and souls in me. How exhausting. What if he was cranky and it completely shattered my illusion (ahem) of him?

No need to worry. He couldn’t have been sweeter. He hugged me as I approached him and as we hugged, I told him I’d been waiting 21 years to meet him. We were cheek to cheek here. This is important. As we withdrew from the hug, he said, bless him, “well it’s so great to finally meet you,” in that beautiful voice. And as we situated ourselves for the photo op, he thanked me for coming and I think I thanked him for coming and then:

I wished him a good show and then retreated to the door, keeping it together just long enough to get out of his line of sight before I started sobbing. 

I’ve yammered on ad nauseum why he is so special to me. I’ll spare you now. But this was...just incredible. And in the light of the current Fleetwood Mac drama, it was exactly what I needed to see and feel from him in order for me to move on. It was like dad telling me it’s okay to still love mom even if they couldn’t be together anymore. Now, I’m 38. I realize how silly that sounds, but it’s a good analogy, nonetheless. He’s doing fine. He’s happy. He’s at peace. Heartbroken, yes, but he has no hate in his heart for the other four. He’s genuinely happy to be moving forward as he is, and grateful to those of us who support him. And I feel like I can finally breathe again after six months.

Opening act J.S. Ondara did about six of his songs and it was only him and his acoustic guitar. He did one song a cappella and it was beautiful. He was a delight. Snappy dresser. Humble and quietly funny. Before each song, he’d tell us the name of it and then say, “You’ve never heard it”. It was a slow start to a rock show, something Ondara noted by saying it was his job to depress us so that Lindsey could cheer us back up, but his music is very pretty. He’s a talented guy, and how special to be given this opportunity to open for a man like Lindsey Buckingham?

Okay! On to Lindsey’s show. After a brief intermission after Ondara finished, Lindsey’s band walked out on stage, followed soon after by Lindsey himself. He was greeted to thunderous applause and cheers and about half of the theatre stood for him. Me included. Obviously.

The set list was perfect and they moved through the songs one after the other, with Lindsey pausing to speak here and there between the songs. What struck me most was how many times he thanked us for being there. He must have thanked us ten times throughout the show. His sincerity shown through and touched my heart and I’m so glad I was there to experience it.

ALSO, he barks. Yep. Literally. He literally barks along with the dog at the end of “Holiday Road” and he is such a nerd I can hardly even stand it. I love him. “Bark bark, BARK. Bark bark, BARK! Bark like a dog!” And of course I did. Duh. And then he did this, not even semi-erotic, but full-on-erotic moan at the end of the song and...let’s just say it was nice. He threw us one of those nerdy smile/laugh things as the song ended before he retrieved his next guitar for the next song. 

Shout out to Lindsey’s guitar tech, Stanley, by the way, who was working his ass off keeping all those guitars in order and in tune and passing them off to Lindsey in time. I think Lindsey switched guitars for just about every song, save his three song acoustic set. But he might have even switched guitars then. I can’t remember. I’m still thinking about the barking. In any case, Stan is an unsung hero in Buckingham’s world.

I was worried how the acoustics would be in a theatre setting, but there was no need. The sound was incredible. The band was incredible. These guys were beasts. And Lindsey had an absolute blast. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen him that free and relaxed and, dare I say it, spontaneous? It was so special. He received huge applause after every song and many people stood for him as well. The ones who didn’t stand, I attribute to the tightened security. Seriously. These guys were strict. I know they were just doing their jobs but... what do you mean I can’t stand? I get the no pictures thing but, really? We can’t stand? Honestly, these guys looked like they would toss you out if you sneezed. Who doesn’t let people go to the stage during Go Your Own Way?? You know Lindsey wants us to strum his guitar during it... right?

What stood out most to me was this performance of Never Going Back Again. Of course we were all thinking of Fleetwood Mac during it. Lindsey too, clearly. I’ve never seen such a passionate performance of that song. His final “I’m never going back again” was powerful, resolute, and it felt very final. Of course that made me cry. I needed a Gatorade after the show to replenish my fluids. Never say never, of course, especially with those five people, but this change feels permanent. 

I noticed something during the guitar outro for I’m So Afraid, and I realize now that it was there throughout the entire show: A genuine happiness from Lindsey to be there performing for us. I have always, always felt angst and pain from him during his performances, like a palpable pain resided just underneath that unending jittery energy of his, and his performances were his only way to release it, if only temporarily. 

Thursday night there was something different there. I think it was contentment. A full-circle completion that he is proud of, perhaps. The knowledge that he did everything he could to preserve the legacy Fleetwood Mac created over those 43 years together, and generate a different outcome for them and for their fans. A hopefulness, because he still has so much more to share with us, and a delight that we are still here for him, waiting patiently for whatever it is he has to share.

I’ll finish with this: Watching Lindsey Buckingham play guitar the way he does, watching him belt out songs and stomp around the stage with the energy of a man less than half his age, is the closest thing to what is called God that I’ll ever experience. That’s not hyperbolic fangirl nonsense. It’s truth. There is something wholly divine about that man’s talent. I am not a religious person. I believe in the Universe above all else. But if what is called God means awe and if it means love and peace and if God is the knowledge that there is something greater than me out there that can save my soul, this is as close to God as I will get. And I’m here for it, amen.